The Gang Writes A Self Help Book

The 7 Secrets of Awakening the Highly Effective Four-Hour Giant, Today: The Gang Writes a Self Help Book was published by Titan Books, rights reserved to FX Network, in 2015.

The book is supposedly written by the five fictitious main characters. Everything within it is a work of fiction. It contains transcripts of dialogue that the gang recorded of them having typical IASIP style conversations (as they were too lazy to write things down), chapters written by each character, and magazine style quizzes written by them.

The book is split into five areas: Relationships, Financial Success and Career, Fashion and Personal Grooming, Health and Diet, Survival Skills. Though each chapter is only vaguely related to the area in the book, since the gang’s thought process is so disjointed. Although the title claims there are seven areas of a book, that is promptly stated to be a lie because apparently people are drawn to the number 7 in marketing.

As the chapters are written by the gang, they’re all extremely unreliable narrators. Each chapter is narcissistic. Since Charlie cannot write, his chapters have been dictated to the other characters, who take it in turns to write for him. Because the gang are all so very narcissistic, they end up make each of Charlie’s chapters about themselves. Artemis is the only person to properly write one of Charlie’s chapters for him, likely because she transcribed The Nightman Cometh. Some of Charlie’s handwritten, presumably in crayon, poems and drawings are included.

The overall running theme throughout the book is that a publisher from Titan Books was conned into signing a contract with the gang, after being plied with liquor and talked into it by Charlie. Throughout the book, there are notes added by the fictitious publisher that show just how much they hate the gang. It is stated that this publishing deal had essentially destroyed their business, and they were now in the middle of a law suit against the gang.

The usual running jokes such as Mac being gay, Charlie loving cheese, and the guys treating Dee terribly are present. In one of the transcripts, Charlie actually meets who he believes to be “Holland Oates” referencing Sweet Dee Is Dating a Retarded Person, where he says that “Holland Oates” is one person. John Oates explains to Charlie that he is simply one half of a duo, but Charlie doesn’t understand.

The book is dedicated to Jamie Nelson, and Dooley. There are disclaimers stating that the “advice” could get you arrested, maimed, or killed. The fictitious publisher begins the book by warning people not to read it.